| Airplane II: The Sequel Sound Clip | File Name / Clip Length / File Size |
| "...No dogs are allowed on the shuttle, son. I'm afraid Scraps will have to be shot..." | scraps.wav / 0:20 / 78.5 Kb |
| "...You're going to head up the division in charge of babies for Mr. and Mrs. Simon Kurtz. That's an order, Lieutenant." | deptofbabies.wav / 0:14 / 56.7 Kb |
| "...What's the fastest animal on Earth? The cheetah, next. Should I fake my orgasms? Yes. Thank you. Next." | next.wav / 0:17 / 70.2 Kb |
| "Don't you understand? They framed me and put me in here to keep me out of the way..." | framed.wav / 0:11 / 44.9 Kb |
| "...What's his problem? The man's obviously crazy." | crazy.wav / 0:10 / 42.0 Kb |
| "It's funny how fate can make heroes out of cowards." | fate.wav / 0:02 / 11.4 Kb |
| "...This thing stinks to high heaven of kickback..." | kickback.wav / 0:19 / 76.4 Kb |
| "Ted Striker was right when he test piloted that sucker, and what did he get for telling the truth? A one-way ticket to the funny farm." | strikerright.wav / 0:06 / 25.8 Kb |
| Someone buys a time bomb in a very casual manner | timebomb.wav / 0:09 / 37.6 Kb |
| "...I'm very excited, Simon. I guess this is a first for you, eh kid. No, I've been excited before." | excited.wav / 0:07 / 28.6 Kb |
| "...Techically, Dunn was under Oveur, and I was under Dunn..." | oveurungerdunn.wav / 0:23 / 91.5 Kb |
| "...No more kids yelling, 'Your old man's a psychopathic sex pervert.'..." | pervert.wav / 0:20 / 80.2 Kb |
| "...Andy went to pieces? No, Andy was the navigator. He was all right. Buddy went to pieces. It was awful how he came unglued. Howie came unglued?..." | buddyandyhowie.wav / 0:29 / 117 Kb |
| "Doctor, can you give me your impression of Mr. Striker? I'm sorry, I don't do impressions. My training is in psychiatry." | impression.wav / 0:05 / 21.5 Kb |
| "...How serious is it, Mr. Dunn? Uh, I can't tell, sir. You can tell me. I'm the captain." | overheat.wav / 0:08 / 33.6 Kb |
| "...Cut the 'not where I'm sitting' shit..." | humanerror.wav / 0:10 / 42.0 Kb |
| "...Should I check the rear databanks? No, why don't you check out the rear databanks." | databanks.wav / 0:14 / 55.8 Kb |
| "...Jimmy, do you like it when Scraps holds on to your leg and rubs up and down?" | rubsupdown.wav / 0:08 / 31.7 Kb |
| "Mr. Dunn and Mr. Unger were sucked out an airlock in the computer room. Both together?..." | together.wav / 0:08 / 33.5 Kb |
| What "a tad" means in space terms | tad.wav / 0:08 / 34.3 Kb |
| "...Ever since Reagan fired the controllers, he's been completely senile. Yeah, but what about McCrosky? Pretty much the same as Reagan." | senile.wav / 0:08 / 35.2 Kb |
| "I want to know absolutely everything that's happened up 'til now. Well, let's see, first the earth cooled..." | everything.wav / 0:19 / 76.9 Kb |
| "...A large, fiery ball at the center of our solar system, but that's not important now. We're headed right for it." | sun.wav / 0:06 / 25.6 Kb |
| "...They should... let all the psychopaths out of the asylums to run the world. No, I guess on second thought, that's a bad idea." | letpsychosout.wav / 0:13 / 52.0 Kb |
| "...Maybe she's got her ship together." | shiptogether.wav / 0:05 / 21.7 Kb |
| "Can I ask you a question? What is it?..." | question.wav / 0:07 / 29.0 Kb |
| "We're not living in the past or the present anymore. This is the future." | future.wav / 0:04 / 17.6 Kb |
| "...Jacobs, what have you got on Elaine Dickinson? Well, I'm two inches taller, a better dancer, and much more fun to be with." | onelaine.wav / 0:07 / 27.5 Kb |
| "...The name's Striker. I'm sitting down and facing front..." | position.wav / 0:06 / 26.4 Kb |
| "...Damn, we lost him again. Could be those sunspots. Could be your dishwashing detergent." | losthim.wav / 0:09 / 38.0 Kb |
| "...We said all our operators are busy, so please stand by." | standby.wav / 0:14 / 55.8 Kb |
| "...What's it look like? A radio? Well, about so big, green, with numbers and lots of knobs..." | looklike.wav / 0:09 / 38.3 Kb |
| "...Not a buh, a bomb." | bbomb.wav / 0:06 / 24.5 Kb |
| "...Would everybody move to the lounge who is not carrying a bomb?" | movefrombomb.wav / 0:06 / 26.6 Kb |
| "No one has to know about your problem. No one has to know you're impotent. DON'T SAY THAT WORD!!" | impotent.wav / 0:07 / 27.7 Kb |
| "Simon was a fool to eject now. You mean? That's right, premature ejection." | premejection.wav / 0:04 / 19.1 Kb |
| "...We have no tower, sir... Why the hell aren't I notified about these things!?" | notower.wav / 0:07 / 28.9 Kb |
| "...We could try ignoring it, sir..." | ignore.wav / 0:11 / 44.1 Kb |
| "...Until that day over Macho Grandé. Over Macho Grandé, sir? No, I'm afraid I'll never get over Macho Grandé." | machogrande.wav / 0:13 / 52.1 Kb |
| "These lights keep blinking out of sequence, sir... Get them to blink in sequence." | outofsequence.wav / 0:06 / 24.3 Kb |
| "I guess irony can be pretty ironic sometimes." | irony.wav / 0:03 / 14.0 Kb |
| "...I can't stand it anymore, the blinking and beeping and flashing..." | blinkinglights.wav / 0:27 / 106 Kb |
| "...Coming in low is part of every textbook approach. It's just something you have to do when you land." | cominginlow.wav / 0:11 / 45.9 Kb |