| School for Scoundrels Sound Clip | File Name / Clip Length / File Size |
|---|
| "...Between those shorts and that little ass truck, that shit's humiliating, man..." | humiliating.wav / 0:10 / 41.7 Kb |
| "Can someone explain to me how one of my parking enforcement agents manages to lose...?" | loseall.wav / 0:11 / 44.0 Kb |
| "Becky thinks that any guy that even talks to a girl has to be a stalker. I don't. I just think he is. Aren't you, Roger?" | stalker.wav / 0:07 / 30.1 Kb |
| "For new student registration, please press one. Is this a recording? Just press it..." | justpress.wav / 0:08 / 34.4 Kb |
| "Congratulations, you're already my worst student..." | worst.wav / 0:18 / 71.4 Kb |
| "...Sorry doesn't make a manilla..." | manilla.wav / 0:10 / 42.3 Kb |
| "...Would one of you sit in the damn chair?..." | chair.wav / 0:13 / 53.6 Kb |
| Dr. P thinks Roger is worse than a loser | loser.wav / 0:14 / 55.7 Kb |
| "You can't help yourself because yourself sucks..." | ignoreself.wav / 0:10 / 41.5 Kb |
| "...You wanted the tit and you got the tit..." | tit.wav / 0:18 / 73.2 Kb |
| "I'm sorry. Never be sorry..." | sorry.wav / 0:07 / 27.5 Kb |
| "...I always saw you as a flannel pj's kind of guy..." | flannel.wav / 0:10 / 42.6 Kb |
| "...I took a good, long, hard look in the mirror, and you know what? I didn't like what I saw." | didntlike.wav / 0:12 / 48.2 Kb |
| "...My life's been, like, ten times better ever since you left..." | movedon.wav / 0:15 / 59.7 Kb |
| "...Kid, please, if I don't give you this ticket, I ain't gonna make my quota." | ticket.wav / 0:15 / 59.0 Kb |
| Dr. P gives out "confidential" information about his students | confidential.wav / 0:26 / 103 Kb |
| "...Friends are just obstacles that stand between you and success." | friends.wav / 0:07 / 30.9 Kb |
| "...She works as an Australian?" | australian.wav / 0:10 / 40.0 Kb |
| "There are two types of men in this world: those who run shit, like me, and those who eat shit, like you." | 2types.wav / 0:07 / 28.9 Kb |
| "...I don't care if she is my mother. There's a million other basements in this city that I can live in." | basements.wav / 0:05 / 22.5 Kb |
| Roger finally asks Amanda out on a date | facedoor.wav / 0:07 / 31.1 Kb |
| Dr. P's secrets to getting laid on a first date | getlaid.wav / 0:22 / 86.4 Kb |
| "...That's something we have in common. You complain a lot?" | complain.wav / 0:25 / 98.6 Kb |
| "Have you ever been drunk before? ...Try, like, every weekend ever since I was eleven." | drunk.wav / 0:08 / 32.6 Kb |
| "...How about... I give you a standard issue beatdown...?" | beatdown.wav / 0:12 / 47.7 Kb |
| "...It was a different kind of raffle, and there was nobody else there but me." | raffle.wav / 0:09 / 36.9 Kb |
| "...Moving Out is not a play. Fine, what would you call it? I don't know, a gay." | gayplay.wav / 0:13 / 51.1 Kb |
| "...Why would I tell you where they are? So you can go find her and murder her...?" | murderher.wav / 0:12 / 48.7 Kb |
| "Every once in a while, a shepherd has to pluck a sheep from the herd and challenge him..." | shepherd.wav / 0:14 / 58.0 Kb |
| Dr. P challenges Roger for Amanda's heart | gameon.wav / 0:10 / 42.0 Kb |
| "...I've got two chics back at my place who think I'm Moby." | moby.wav / 0:07 / 31.3 Kb |
| "Lescher might rape you... It's just an idea of something bad that might happen." | rape.wav / 0:11 / 43.3 Kb |
| "All of my underwear is gone... Can you, uh, describe them for me? Um, you know, were they thongs, dutchcuts, full backs?..." | underwear.wav / 0:19 / 77.2 Kb |
| Roger tries to "out" Dr. P to Amanda | paranoid.wav / 0:11 / 44.2 Kb |
| "...I guess we all can't be lions. Yeah, at this point, uh, I'd say you're more like a, like an emu." | emu.wav / 0:11 / 43.6 Kb |
| "...How, uh, come you don't wear sunglasses? Because I'm not you." | sunglasses.wav / 0:15 / 61.5 Kb |
| "I'm everywhere now. I'm like the wind. *whoosing sounds*" | wind.wav / 0:03 / 15.0 Kb |
| "...That would be quite an elaborate setup, don't you think? No, not really. All you need is a stamp and a unicorn sticker." | setup.wav / 0:23 / 90.2 Kb |
| "...You don't want me to take the gloves off, Roger." | refund.wav / 0:13 / 51.3 Kb |
| "...I'm not here to hurt you. Lie, lie, and lie some more." | lie.wav / 0:10 / 41.9 Kb |
| Roger finds out how Dr. P totally devestated one of his former pupils, Lonnie | liveinsht.wav / 0:28 / 112 Kb |
| "...Lescher raped you, right? No, no, I just think he's a jerk. Oh, yeah. Yeah, me too. I think he's a jerk too..." | rape2.wav / 0:23 / 91.3 Kb |
| "...Do you actually think that after taking a few classes, you, you suddenly are cool?" | cool.wav / 0:22 / 86.2 Kb |
| "A rich, powerful bachelor could do a lot of damage in the city. I'm living proof." | damage.wav / 0:04 / 16.7 Kb |
| "...Think of this as a real life version of 24. Only our version would be called, what, I don't know, 1." | 24.wav / 0:11 / 46.0 Kb |
| "So, Lescher, tell me, have you ever been to Peekskill? *muffled screams*..." | peekskill.wav / 0:12 / 47.2 Kb |
| Roger finally busts Dr. P on his plans with Amanda by showing him a picture of him with his wife | busted.wav / 0:13 / 51.0 Kb |
| "You know, it doesn't happen very often, but every once in a while, I actually teach someone." | teach.wav / 0:05 / 20.8 Kb |
| "...Those who can, do, and those who can't, teach, but you already knew that." | doteach.wav / 0:24 / 95.2 Kb |
| "Yay, congratulations, honey, you win. You're fat. Would you like a big, fat medal?" | fat.wav / 0:06 / 23.8 Kb |
School for Scoundrels stars Jon Heder, Jacinda Barrett, and Billy Bob Thornton. In this movie, Roger (Heder) is a
meter maid down on his luck in society, subject to ridicule by his co-workers and even "little brothers" at a program for
which he volunteers. Roger is totally in love with his neighbor, Amanda (Barrett), but she hardly acknowledges his
existence. In order to turn his life around, Roger follows the advice of one of his friends and enrolls in a "top secret"
course, taught by Dr. P (Thornton), that is supposed to teach one "whatever it is one needs to learn." Even though Dr. P
finds Roger to be "the weakest man in a room full of weak men" at first, Roger sticks with the course and develops a sense
of personal pride, to the point of him finally going out with Amanda. However, Dr. P actually feels threatened by Roger and
tries to steal Amanda away from him to prove that he still has it, initally by lying to Amanda about him being a surgeon and
a widower, when, in fact, Dr. P may still have a living wife. Dr. P takes things way too far beyond lying, including
breaking in to Amanda's apartment and framing Roger for it and getting Roger fired from his job. Roger finds out that Dr. P
had inflicted similar woes on another one of his pupils in the past and that it had long-lasting effects on that pupil.
However, all of the misery Dr. P is inflicting upon Roger may prove beneficial to Roger after all, if Roger can hold on to
Amanda and never gives up hope.